In Memorium: The best man I've ever known

So last Saturday I went to a gaming event with my best friend.  I've known this man for 34 years.  He was the best man at my wedding, and I was a groomsman at his.  Our sons were born 2 months apart.  I have had to talk him down a few times when things were going sideways for him.  I'm not exaggerating when I say he saved my life when my life went sideways.

He dropped me off at my house on his way home.  He lives 3 blocks from me.  Thirty minutes later my wife hears sirens.  Pulse Point says it's at his house.  Their neighbor texts my wife that one of his sons (5 kids) is in the front yard hugging the neighbor. That was enough to send me down there.

He had called 911 before handing off the phone to his  15 year old daughter, then collapsed.  She started CPR on him, and switched off with his 20 year old son.

The EMT's worked on him for an hour before taking him to the ambulance.  His wife was out of town at a work conference, and she asked me to go to the hospital with him. I took his 20 year old son with me and he was pronounced dead almost as soon as we got there.  I will never forget the anguish in his son's voice when he screamed "You mean he's fucking dead?!!!   Why!?  I'm only 20, what the fuck am I going to do now?!"

My wife said I may have gotten 5 more kids, and honestly I'm ok with that.  We mutually pledged to take care of each other's families if anything happened, and I guess it happened.

I'm not sure when CBR will pick back up, but now you know why it just stopped.

Fair winds and following seas my friend.  I will see you on the other side. You will be missed.

In Memoriam: Travis Heermann

 In memoriam: Travis Heermann

Amazon.com: Travis Heermann: books, biography, latest update

Well, I had hoped to avoid making these kind of posts a regular occurrence, but here we are.

Travis was a friend of mine going back to college (early 90's), and we were pretty tight for a long time.  We gamed together, we did home renovation projects, and went to Gen-Con.  Unfortunately, over the last 10-15 years we had grown apart, but I wished him no harm.

Back in December he was involved in a freak motorcycle accident and suffered massive brain trauma.  They initially gave him a 5% chance to wake up.  He did indeed wake up, but the trauma was catastrophic.  Despite months of intensive therapy, he did not improve, and he was placed in hospice.  Last week he passed on.

Fair winds and following seas Travis, may He grant you Grace in the next life.

In Memoriam: Ai Loves

This is the first post of its kind, and hopefully the last.  Ai Loves (Ai is Japanese for "love/affection"; the "Love love" was a very typical joke for her) was the penname of a woman who was very private about her real identity for many reason.  I reviewed her book and gave it a very qualified review because it explores a lot of kinks that I don't share and I will freely admit I find some a bit baffling, but that's not really a problem.  That review was the genesis of a very odd friendship.  Ai was a fascinating person with a wide array of experiences and skills.  She could brainstorm an entire fictional world in no time at all. It was amazing and a bit awe inspiring.  She was fluent in multiple languages and helped me dip by toe in kanji for some art purposes.

Unfortunately, Ai had a great many health issues, which frequently manifested as personality quirks.  She was stunningly self-aware of these issues, and would freely admit to them and explain them if asked. She knew that her problems would lead to her untimely death, and she accepted that fact with a grace and dignity that I can only hope to emulate if I am ever in a similar situation.

I think the thing that I will remember most about her is her unfailing Grace and Generosity. She was always willing to give you some of her precious time, and listen with grace to your problems.

I do, and will miss talking to her.  She helped me with a game I was running at a convention and as a "thank you" I added a character for her.  She picked a Tenuki and I had to dip into eBay to find a suitable miniature.  Below is her tribute mini.  The kanji on the kimono is Ai.

May you find Grace, Healing, and Peace Ai.  I hope to see you on the other side.